Tag Archives: Connection

Crazy Busy, or just Crazy?

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It’s been a long time between blogs. Life rushes along at a pace that sees us blink, only to discover we’re over halfway through another year. (When did that happen?!)

Sometimes I wonder how we get ourselves into such a rush. One thing, then another, and suddenly we don’t seem to have time to meet up with friends, watch movies with family, or take those trips to visit out-of-the-way places. (Let’s face it, even cleaning the house and weeding the garden can be a challenge!)

Sometimes I wonder whether there’s a hidden gear stick somewhere that, if we could just find it, we could bring the pace down a little.

And yet, in the busy many great things can happen. And have been happening. For me, there’s just not been as much writing as I’d like …

A question I’ve been asked more than once is how to maintain a consistent writing habit with everything else that draws on our time. Usually my response runs along the lines of there being different seasons in life, with a different focus. Sometimes writing must take a back seat.

Sounds philosophical, right? I even tried giving up writing six or so months ago. Unfortunately I didn’t factor on the characters in my head not getting the memo! (Hey, that’s not as bad as it sounds.)

The fact is we’re wired for story. Lisa Cron reiterates this over and again in her writing resources. (And if you don’t know who Lisa Cron is and you’re a writer, seriously, you MUST google her.) Even in the busy, even in the I-can’t-write-now seasons, we can’t (and shouldn’t) stop the stories. But the stories I’m talking about aren’t necessarily the next brilliant novel on our writing lists.

By stories, I mean those everyday narratives of life: the who-we-are and how-we-are-doing stories. The stories that empower us to connect, if we allow them time to be shared and received. And the more we learn about ourselves as humans, the more we understand the critical importance of meaningful connection. This takes time, of which we seem to have so little.

It doesn’t matter whether you’re a writer or reader or neither, find someone. Find several someones. Somehow we need to find a way to pause the crazy-busy for a while and share our stories with each other.

Even if we have to find that magical gear shift and drop it down one for a while, I know it’ll be worth it.

Ripple

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Many years ago, as a university student, I had just exited a train station on my way home, when a perfect stranger strode across my path. He paused to say, “How’s it kickin’ chicken? Don’t worry, you’ll make it,” and then kept on walking, disappearing into a crowd of people boarding a bus.

For all his long hair and ‘biker’ look, he could have been an angel in disguise. By my appearance, he couldn’t have possibly known that I was so unwell that even the thought of tackling the required hill to reach home overwhelmed me.

I think back on that day and marvel at the timing of it all.

Such a simple, seemingly random exchange gave me enough of a boost to get home, despite my fever and sheer exhaustion. Much to my surprise, I even managed to retain some of the information conveyed during the lectures I’d attended!

Have you ever experienced anything like that? Someone drops fleetingly into your world and changes it in an instant. Conversely, have you ever felt moved to say or do something for a friend, or even stranger, without any clue as to why?

I must confess that when such exchanges occur, there’s something exciting about the investment of energy, time, finances, encouragement – whatever it is – that can be deposited. It’s like a sense of knowing that someone’s journey has purposefully intersected yours.

For me, the connection I referred to earlier gave me enough resilience not only for that walk, but also to get up the next day and drag myself back to university again. Eventually a friend hauled me off to the doctor’s (only undergrad laboratory session I ever missed!) and I recovered, but who knows what I might have done if that man hadn’t taken the opportunity to encourage me? I might have stayed in bed for days and fallen further behind with my study. I might have even given up on my study for the semester. His words gave me the strength to tackle another day, which was another little step towards attaining my degree.

This brings to mind the image of a fish flipping up out of the water of a lake and plopping back under the surface. You see the split second of action, hear the splash, but long after the fish has disappeared, that motion will translate into a ripple that runs out towards the periphery of the body of water. Along the way the tiny wave might wash against a boat, some water reeds, waterbirds, or sometimes it can be seen reaching all the way to the water’s edge.

Every person we contact presents an opportunity to create a ripple – positively or negatively. The intersection of our lives might be simply a smile to a stranger and no more, or it could be like the man crossing that road and create a ripple that runs to the very end of our life. We may never know if our wave reaches the edge, but what a privilege to consider that it might.